PROJECT FRIENDSHIP | The Platonic Soulmate

There are plenty of different types of relationship one can have with another person. One of them is what I can define at best as being completely, platonically in love with some else – it’s a friendship that runs so deep to almost be confused with “true love”, but without the sexual aspect of romantic love.

Let me tell you about my Platonic Soulmate: G.


G and I have been friends for quite a long time now – about nine years. It started out slowly and grew into something incredible. I like to think of our friendship as a truly special one, because she is truly special to me.

What makes me think of G as a platonic soulmate? Well, it’s quite simple. What I feel for her is different than what I feel for anyone else. I could go on for hours talking about her. I could tell you that one she smiles at me, I feel like I just got sun kissed by the most beautiful star in the sky. I can tell you that her eyes change colour depending on the weather and her a bit following her mood as well. I can tell you I love the three little triangular moles she has on her arms and I love her curly hair, even when it gets a bit unruly. I can tell you that her voice has the immediate power of calming me down and her laugh is the most perfect melody out there.

…So you might get why this sounds a bit like someone talking about their lover, but she’s my best friend and I think of her as a perfect angel.

Just the other day I had one of my “moments”. G had posted some selfies and I felt the urge to sigh dramatically at her beauty and show those pictures to my mother, asking her “how is she so beautiful?”. My mum smiled at me knowingly – she knows by now how I can get about G. Sometimes I worry – does her boyfriend tell her every day how lovely she is? By God, I hope he does. I should make sure he does…

But this is only the least important part of G. The real wonder is on the inside of her. She is one of the most complicated people I have ever met, and I love that about her. You cannot simply understand her at a single glance – she is a multitude of truths, carefully layered, carefully guarded.

If I had to associate a quote from a book to me and her, I would say this is the one:

“…If people were rain, I was drizzle and she was a hurricane.” – John Green

Because while I don’t think there’s anything particularly wrong with drizzle, it’s something that’s just there – you might as well not notice it at all. Who on earth can miss a hurricane? If it passes near you, it will hardly go unseen – unless you’re the blindest, most unaware person on the planet, and in that case I feel sorry for you. Sure, if it presents itself when you’re not expecting it, it might even hurt you. It might leave a scar. But damn, what an honor to survive a close meeting with a hurricane. Some things – people – are worth getting hurt over, because they leave a mark in your life that changes you forever.

Among the things I want the most in life, if for G to be happy and safe and healthy. I can hardly think of something I wouldn’t do for her. But I have to admit that there are two main reasons I could never give her up, and they are selfish reasons – though maybe, in the end, love is always a bit selfish. I’m still unsure about how love is supposed to work.

The first reason is very simple: she makes me happy. Spending time with her, talking with her about even the silliest things makes me happy. I don’t want to ever give up the feelings that she makes gifts me with, because they’re something positive I can always count on.

The second reason has to do with the complexness of her personality – I think I can say in all honesty that gaining her full trust was a very long process. I can’t pinpoint the moment I did gain it, nor when I even started trying to. But now that I feel like I have that trust… it might be one of the most precious things I have. I will die first than betray that trust. Because a lot of people trust so easily, but not G. So to be gifted with something that barely anyone else has… it makes me feel like one of the most special people in the world. I am forever grateful of this.

So this is why I like to think of G as my platonic soulmate. I am in love with her in the purest of ways and there is not a single thing I would change about her.

May be the face I can’t forget
A trace of pleasure or regret
May be my treasure or the price I have to pay
She may be the song that summer sings
May be the chill that autumn brings
May be a hundred different things
Within the measure of a day.

May be the beauty or the beast
May be the famine or the feast
May turn each day into a heaven or a hell
She may be the mirror of my dreams
A smile reflected in a stream
She may not be what she may seem
Inside her shell

She who always seems so happy in a crowd
Whose eyes can be so private and so proud
No one’s allowed to see them when they cry
She may be the love that cannot hope to last
May come to me from shadows of the past
That I’ll remember till the day I die

May be the reason I survive
The why and wherefore I’m alive
The one I’ll care for through the rough and ready years
Me I’ll take her laughter and her tears
And make them all my souvenirs
For where she goes I’ve got to be
The meaning of my life is

She, she, she” – Elvis Costello



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